Post by Young90th on May 5, 2008 18:51:26 GMT -5
Got this in a chain email. It got deleted on the big board for some reason.
Drafting Guys over 60
>
> (Obviously written by a Former Soldier.)
>
> New direction for any war: Send service vets over 60!
>
> I am over 60 and the Armed Forces think I'm too old to track down
>terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got
>the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to
>fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a
>military unit until you're at least 35.
>
> For starters:
> Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys
>only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
>additional seconds per day to concentrate on the en emy.
>
> Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier
>is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and
>hungry!' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some your not a very nice person that
>desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a
>while.
>
> An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys
>always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm
>tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing
>some
> fanatical son-of-a-----------.
>
> If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put
>them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
>
> Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed
>and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an
>appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get
>out of the house & away from the screaming and yelling.
>
> They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in
>combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the
>side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can
>hear t he Drill Sgt. In the 'New Army' now, 'Get down and give me ...er...
>One.'
>
> Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've
>never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
>
> An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to
>shave, and to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't
>figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back
>of his head.
>
> These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little
>more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
>
> Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The
>last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million
>pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that
>their best years are already behind them. Also, we won't get in trouble
>for mistreating prisoners. We won't take any.
>
> If nothing else, put us on border patrol. We will have it secured the
>first night!
>
> Share this with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type so they
>can read it!!!!
>
Drafting Guys over 60
>
> (Obviously written by a Former Soldier.)
>
> New direction for any war: Send service vets over 60!
>
> I am over 60 and the Armed Forces think I'm too old to track down
>terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got
>the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to
>fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a
>military unit until you're at least 35.
>
> For starters:
> Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys
>only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
>additional seconds per day to concentrate on the en emy.
>
> Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier
>is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and
>hungry!' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some your not a very nice person that
>desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a
>while.
>
> An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys
>always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm
>tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing
>some
> fanatical son-of-a-----------.
>
> If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put
>them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
>
> Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed
>and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an
>appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get
>out of the house & away from the screaming and yelling.
>
> They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in
>combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the
>side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can
>hear t he Drill Sgt. In the 'New Army' now, 'Get down and give me ...er...
>One.'
>
> Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've
>never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
>
> An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to
>shave, and to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't
>figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back
>of his head.
>
> These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little
>more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
>
> Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The
>last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million
>pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that
>their best years are already behind them. Also, we won't get in trouble
>for mistreating prisoners. We won't take any.
>
> If nothing else, put us on border patrol. We will have it secured the
>first night!
>
> Share this with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type so they
>can read it!!!!
>